• Jude-Anne Phillip

Married with kids – the new meaning of romance

Updated: Jun 10, 2019

When you have kids nothing is your own. Not your time, not your privacy and not your bed.

Needless to say, the term romance takes a whole other meaning when you have to juggle your relationship with your significant other and your kids.

Before kids, my husband and I used to be spontaneous. Go wherever the breeze blows. Now, that breeze has to be scheduled weeks in advance to get a babysitter or, if no one is available to babysit, around our kids’ bedtime and in our house.

Before kids, a romantic dinner included a nice restaurant, nice food, wine, you know, the usual. Now, a romantic dinner is whatever my husband and I eat together while watching a movie, again, while the kids are asleep. At least we are alone, and we have wine.

Before kids, making love in different places of the house (let your imagination run wild), was a matter of choice. It is now our only option as our bed is always occupied by our kids. It is actually amazing how creative you can get when you are in the mood but your kids are awake.

Romantic moments with my husband have definitely changed since having kids. I mean they aren’t necessarily the things good rom-coms are made of, however, as un-sexy as they may be, it is important for us to continue having these moments. These moments are what bring us closer together and keep our union strong. These moments give us something to laugh at 15 years from now when the kids are grown and we finally do get to have the house to ourselves. Until then, we will just continue to sneak ice cream in the car, while the kids are asleep in the back seat.

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