• Jude-Anne Phillip

3 signs that your child is ready to talk about sex

Updated: Jun 10, 2019

My son is almost 6 years old and already the questions have started coming. Yes, those questions. Those questions that make you want the ground to open up and swallow you whole.

You may think that 6 years old is pretty young to be having “the talk”, but children have access to a lot of information, more so than when we were young, and it is better that they learn about sex from us rather than from their friends or another unreliable source.

Now it doesn’t mean that at this stage, I will tell him every single thing about sex, but we do think that it is time to at least introduce the topic of sex in the most age appropriate way.

So how do you know when your child is ready for “the talk”? Here are three signs that may signal the need for some one on one time with your not so little ones.

Increased curiosity

Ever since I was pregnant with my second son, my first son’s curiosity about sex increased. It started off with questions such as “How do babies get in your belly?” and gradually developed to “Why does the male dog jump on the female dog’s back?” and “How do you get a wife?”

The fact that your kids are asking questions means that they are noticing the various aspects of relationships around them and they want answers.

Kids observe everything and are smarter than we think, so avoiding these questions or trying to lie your way out of it won’t work, and quite frankly isn’t the best thing for your child’s well-being.

Developing crushes

My son has reached a stage where every now and then he talks about other boys in his class liking certain girls in his class. Or we might even joke about which girl is his girlfriend.

Even though at this age their concept of girlfriend and boyfriend may not be on the same level as teenage love, the fact is they are thinking about it and are talking about it with their friends.

Instead of trivializing or even ignoring the feelings that your child may have for their first crush, acknowledge that your child is starting to venture into the gut-wrenching world of puberty (yikes).

Making their toys “wrestle”

Have you ever had a moment where your children were playing with dolls, action figures or stuffed animals and when you ask them what the figures are doing your kids, with a giggle, say they are having sex?

Well, that happened to me.  After I regained consciousness I asked my son what exactly did he know about sex and he replied “everything”.

It turns out he did not know as much as he thought but I used that moment to fill him in on a few minor, but important details.

Although these signs, generally speaking, are good indicators of whether or not you should initiate the sex talk, every child is different and ultimately you would know and should determine whether or not your child is ready for the talk.

Check out the two videos below from Your Tango and Modern Mom that openly discuss the experience of talking to your kids about sex.

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